A Great Decision

I'm rushing to prepare the Agenda for our Word facilitators but I couldn't start because I stumbled upon her and this. It's amazing and it is one of the best decisions I have made - to make her my wedding photographer (of course, another one being marrying him).

So what have I learnt from the wedding? These:

1. that if you set out choosing to be happy on your day, you will realize that a lot of things do not matter. All that matters is that you are happy and that makes your friends happy too;
2. that if you learn to relax and laugh at near tragedies, you will enjoy your day better (we agreed to laugh at everything that goes wrong);
3. that God is still in control and He knows your heart's desires (I was in charge of decorations and was unsure if it would turn out right - this was my right brain working - but it turned out even better);
4. that's its ok if you lose your bulletins the night before the wedding although you had stayed up with him till 3am the day before to get them printed;
5. that your friends are wonderful people - they are there for you for so many things you forget to do or say, and you realize, you love them even more;
6. that you should be yourself - just because its a wedding does not mean it has to be Martha Stewart approved;
7. that it will never turn out exactly the way you want it - it usually turns out even better when you trust that God will be there with you;
   
8. that whatever said and done, your family loves you;
9. that you suddenly realize that you love him so much more than you thought;
10. that whether you feel it or not, God is blessing you with so many things you do not see... until later.

On my wedding day, I remember:

1. Praying together before he arrived;
   
2. Waiting in my room with her, and sharing how I felt, which relaxed me a lot;
3. Waiting in the car and having her with me (I love you so much);
   
4. Looking once again at the wonderful church decorations we had spent so much time making;
5. Having a brilliant worship team (the most wonderful one, if I may say so) and a singing my heart out to God;
6. Having him on the piano;
7. Having the Pastor we love officiate our wedding;
   
8. Looking into his eyes as we said our vows (I didn't cry - yay!);
9. Watching the bubbles floating through the air while we walked out;
10. Smiling until my jaws froze.

There are so many more things I remember. It was a wonderful day. I had so much fun and I hope my friends did too. She named it the wedding festival, and I hope it was as fun for you as it was for me.

Now, on to the marriage bit.......

Counting the Days

It's 4 more days of singlehood. There are still tonnes to do - finalizing the bulletin, doing me nails, shaving (now now, no funny ideas please), buying some stuff I've been summoned to bring for my surprise hen's party (you girls be nice now, I'll remember everything and if you are not married, I'll do it twice worse when it's your turn...kekeke...), doing the dinner seating, finalizing the slideshows, finalizing the decorations.....

Whatever it is, I have decided that I will be happy because it's our day and God has blessed it, and that I will giggle / laugh heartily at anything that happens that is not in the plan. I'm quite confident the Mr. Big-Carrie situation is not going to happen.. hehe.

I'm looking forward to collect my dress. I lurve it. And miss it. It must be about 2 months since I tried it on.

Trivialities aside, I hear that someone opened her eyes 2 nights ago! As I prepare for the day, I am thinking of her, of how God is preparing her, so that she can finally hold her in her arms. I hope that by the day I get married, she'll be able to get off the machines and breathe on her own. God is loading her and her family up with testimonies of His glory, and I'm so glad to know such a tiny-in-size-but-strong fighter for God. I love her already, although I have not even seen her yet.

Soon, 'stelle! We are coming to see you!!! Continue to fight ya!! We are praying for you and we love you so so so much!!!

A Carnival!!!

It's a day after "the" day, and it promises to be fun and lotsa yums. Come and help us raise funds for the Women Aid Organization!!!

Quote of the Day

Love People and Use Things - Not Love Things and Use People.

If only.....

It's about 30mins after lunch, and I am reading blogs. If I had to stare at my document again, I will scream and tear my hair out. Seriously.

If only they had blogs and digital cameras whilst I was in England. I would have so many good memories (and this does not mean I'm old ok....). Speaking of which, where is my camera?

On a different thought pattern, I wish I worked for pleasure rather than need. I realized recently that what I really want to do is the total opposite of what I am doing now. I wanna create things with my hands that make people happy, and not have them squint their eyes wondering what this sentence and that paragraph means.

It's not like I hate my job or anything - I'd just rather not be doing this at this point of my life. So yea.... time to think again, I guess.

Yes, my dear, I like this very much. :)

Look What You Guys Did!!!

And this is not even all of it.....




Thank you! We are so grateful for your help!

I'm So Proud of This

One Month

It's a Friday and exactly one month to that day we've been looking forward to. I am pleased to report that we are still as cool as a cucumber. But not without the assurance that God will make everything alright, although the day will most likely not be perfect.

And of course, our dearest, dearest friends who have willingly offered all the help we could get! Thank you!

This feels like the Oscars. Yeech.

Note to self (and all you who are reading) - it is supposed to be fun, not stressful or torturous. Let's keep it that way.

Broken

So, I'm sitting here at Starbucks with jazzy, Christmassy music, and my thoughts are with this one good friend of mine. I think he had his heart broken recently, but if you asked him about it, he would not admit it. He would tell you he is alright, it's just how life is, and that he is now a new man. A new man indeed.

I think whatever broke him made him better. He says God opened his eyes to many things, and to a certain extent, I'm really happy for him. He is different though, neither in a good or bad way, just different. A lot more serious, definitely. I kinda miss his idiosyncrasies, though, and all the times we laughed nonsensically. I secretly hope that this seriousness will pass and the endless nonsensical laughter would come back. But not if it would hamper his quest to be a better person.

If he is reading this, he should know, that his friend will always be on his side and would never hesitate to tell him off, should that be necessary. That she is really glad for him. And that he should smile and laugh wholeheartedly, just because its good for the soul.

We Graduated!!

Yay! We made it. One whole weekend, approximately 16 hours in total. I think our behinds grew a bit from sitting and eating.

When it is not the season to work

So yes, I am aware that I do not update my blog as often as some people do - you'd probably know that it's because I do have a day job to keep. Now, what do I write about?

Its exactly 2 months to the big day. But I shan't write about that, coz everyone has had enough wedding stories and heartwarming pictures.

Hmm... Christmas? All I can say right now is that it's kicking in, so anticipate great things. It's going to be great and we just need to put our hearts into it and pray that God's hand works through us. (Although part of me wishes I don't have to co-ordinate it - I do have a wedding coming up smack in the middle of it... patience patience...)

Ok, I've got it.

Recently, 2 friends of mine found out that their unborn baby has a birth defect - something called Congenital Diaphragm Hernia. (Yes yes, go Google it.) Initially, knowing very little about what's happening, it alarmed a lot of us and I didn't really know what to say to my friends or how to pray for their baby. I cried and I avoided talking to them because I knew I would tear up if I spoke to them about it.

When I finally saw them and talked to them about it, I was amazed at how calm they were and how they appear to be unaffected. Their great faith in God who loves and gives only good things was helping them through this trying time. I am greatly encouraged at how they are positive about it and how they are so sure that however things turn out, it will be for good because God is in control and is holding their baby in His hands.

We prayed and prayed for them. I never ceased to cry every time. But I see what it means to have faith in God - it is not a "Christian jargon", it is something one sees in action when times are trying. And I saw faith in action through this. They were affected, of course, there were tears, there was sadness, but they came back to the realization that the God they trust will not fail them.

I know now that however things turn out for them, the baby will be fine and more importantly, live to bear a testimony about how God held her life in His hand and how God assured her parents that everything will be fine and how she survived her birth defect.

I now cry, not because I'm sad or disappointed or bewildered, but because I'm touched and awed to see how when God says He loves His child, He goes all the way for her.

Preparations

I am a Lacey Balm when it comes to planning stuff. As for the wedding, I wouldn't have kept going if it wasn't for all the stuff I have to make myself (wheeeee!!!). But that too dies off when I lose momentum, so he has to "encourage" me to take it up again. I'm quite good at nagging him to do stuff though... hahaha.... sorry sweetie....

Oh, look what happened to all the cans you donated..... hmm... this is only the beginning though (wheeeeeee!!!).

Touched

I got a call today from someone unexpected. He asked me how I was and he wanted to know how I was doing. Then he prayed for me.

Thank you - you really made my day. I will never forget this and I really see Jesus in your thoughtfulness. Thanks for your encouragement and your heart for God's people.

When is is hard to Love

I realized something today --

When a person loves the hard to love with his own strength, it is really hard. But when a person loves the hard to love and focuses on God, then it becomes easy.

I kid you not. Try it. Focus on the reason for loving people and then try to love someone who seems to be a waste of time. It gets easier... somehow.

End of Meetings As I Know It

Hey you, I'm updating my blog now so that you can leave silly messages on my chatty box thingy. Hehe.

This Friday is the last time we'll be together. Saying this has a melancholic tone to it, but I realized it is not supposed to be melancholic. Changes just means we are constantly on our toes and we are not too comfortable with where we are. Changes enables growth, as a person and as a church. Changes help us learn to discern what is important and what isn't.

So this is goodbye to cell leading. We are multiplying... finally!!!

On a completely different subject, I've been doing the "I'm married to my job" routine recently. I hate it. It's like there are a million things running across your head and you can't seem to peel yourself away from your laptop. You are suddenly really popular, coz your phone keeps ringing and as you speak, your mind is already running through what you have to do after you put down the phone. Your secretary can't keep track of where you need to be and where you are, coz there are just too many things going on - all at once. And of course, you snap at people for being rude and inconsiderate.

Thank God for the realization that this is definitely only temporary. The realization that life is more than just work and completing tasks. Thank God for a family - the blood kind as well as the church kind - that I can look forward to in the end.

Oh, new blog to visit, people. It's dodgy, but that's really the reflection of who he is. And I'm proud of who he is. Really.

The Day

I have not blogged about the wedding preparations, because we want it to be a surprise to our friends (yes, you who are reading this now).

However, I thought I'd give ya'll some hints, just to whet the appetite (and to answer all your "so how are preparations?" questions):

1. We are trying to kill all the typical expectations of a wedding.
2. Flowers are bleah.
3. Maroon... and white... maybe off-white.
   
4. Expect paper... lots of em.
5. Things that will remind you of the person he is and the person I am.
6. Aim of event : fun for all.
7. Bubbles? Maybe.....

Ok, that shall be all - won't wanna spoil the fun for you. Hee.

Melancholy

I wish they see what I see. I wish things are easier. But God never promised that life would be easy - if it was, Jesus wouldn't have to die for us. Still.....

I have learnt that loving people is not always gay and dandy. It hurts and it's hard.

On a totally unrelated subject, my Madrid mug broke a few months ago, and I really miss it. Sighs.

Know this

CBC Subang is moving back to a cell church structure. I am most pleased that we are united in where we want to go and in allowing God's hand to move us as a church.

On a smaller scale of things, God has been really good to my cell group. As we prayed for multiplication, we grew in numbers. I look forward to see God move us to greater heights and I am praying for wisdom and strength to ensure that everyone is cared for.

I have learnt these important truths I think we should all know:

1. Respect and love our cell leaders. They care for us and they availed themselves to God's ministry. They are not obligated to be our leaders, but they choose to anyway.
2. Encourage our cell leader. Bless them and pray for them. They are humans too. Just because they are our leader, they are not superhumans and need encouragement just like any other person.
3. Be accountable to our cell leader. We need to constantly inform him/her of what we intend to do, how we feel about things, what is happening with us. This helps him/her care for us.
   
4. Cell is about being a family. It's not about what we get from our cell family - it is about what we can give to our cell family.
5. The growth of a cell group do not depend on the cell leader. If we want to grow as a family of God, we have to do it together. If a cell grows, it's the effort of all its members, not just the cell leader. The same principle applies if the cell doesn't grow.
6. Growth is not measured by numbers. It is measured by how much our cell family have grown together in our relationships with God. It is measured by how our hearts are changed as we align ourselves to God's purposes.
7. Rebuke anything that is negative or discouraging, because God is not negative nor discouraging. God's desire is to bless us, so anything that condemns us is not from God. If something is not from God, then there is no point dwelling in it.
   

My heart goes out to all of you cell leaders (including you to-be cell leaders), especially those in CBC Subang. I am so thankful to God for each one of you, old or young, experienced or not, for allowing God to use you. For sacrificing your time for God's purpose. For loving God's people and having a heart to see their needs. For caring about people tirelessly, even when it's difficult and emotionally draining to care. For having the courage to step up and lead when you are fearful. For fighting the race although its tiring.

12 I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. 13 No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.

Philippians 3:12-14 (NLT)

Destination : Seville, Spain

On to more Spanish experiences...

Seville!! Or in Spanish, Sevilla (sir-vee-ya)

Plaza de Espana (Spanish Square)
This is one of my favourite places in Seville.
Trivia : George Lucas filmed part of Star Wars Episode II at the Spanish Square. I kid you not.

Indians in Spain?? They provide good music, though.


One would not have really visited a Spanish city if one did not visit its cathedral. Simply called Catedral de Sevilla (formerly, Catedral de Santa Maria de la Sede; maybe they decided this name was too long), this is a Gothic cathedral which is build over the site of the no longer existing Almohad mosque. It is the largest church in the whole world.


The tomb of Christopher Columbus in the Catedral de Sevilla

Seville Gardens
(Orange trees in the 2nd picture - not very interesting)


There is a myth that if you touch these bushes, true love will come your way.


The Alcuzar - note the Arabic influences


One of the gardens at the Alcuzar.
I was told a garden is considered beautiful if the visitor's 5 senses are aroused - see the beauty, smell the flowers, hear the wind and birds, touch the leaves, taste the fruits.


Visit to the Jewish quarters by foot. The crowd in this picture was led by two guys playing Spanish songs on their guitars. It felt wonderful!
(I still can't get over the blue skies)


The Spanish Christians created this at the Basilica de la Macarena to symbolize Jesus' crucifixion, as the vision of Christ on the cross was thought to be too gruesome to some.


Time to scour the streets of Seville


The Sierpes is the only pedestrian shopping street in Seville.
This is where I bought most of the Seville souvenirs for those of you who got them.


Paella Negro
With squid ink.


No Seville experience would be complete without a Flamenco show. Seville has the best Flamenco shows, or so I was told.

Parting Ways

I have 2 friends who are very dear to me who have recently decided to part ways. When I heard of it, I wasn't sure what I could do to make them feel better. I was sad, of course, but I also trusted in them that their painful decision was made in mutual respect for each other and after much thought.

It reminded me of the time I broke up with my first ever boyfriend. We went out for 3 months or so. I was quite sure I loved him, and he loved me too. For the first time, I had liked someone who had reciprocated. It was the most wonderful feeling.

But I also knew it wasn't quite right. Even so, the wonderful feeling did not go away. I cared very much for him, as I believed he did me. It wasn't right because he wasn't a Christian and I knew he could not then share my faith and my thoughts nor my love for God. After endless nights of praying in tears and thinking until I felt like my head was going to burst, I decided to end it, although I knew in my heart I was going to hurt him really badly and I could not make him understand why. It felt like I was tearing up something so dear to my heart, and it hurt really badly.

That wasn't the end of course. I was aware that I had to live the consequences of my decision. The consequences wasn't surprising - I cried myself to sleep every day for 3 whole months (trust me, I counted). One part of me was sure I did the right thing. The other part of me hurt like hell. I wish I could explain how sorry I was that I hurt him so badly, but that wasn't going to be enough to take away the pain.

Today, I look back, and I thank God that He carried me through that painful time. I am sure I made the right decision. Today, he and I are good friends, and it is easy for us to pick up from where we left of, as friends. Today, he is happy for me whenever I have good news, and I have the same sentiments when he goes through something good. I invited him to my wedding, and he is ecstatic about it.

Which brings me back to my 2 very dear friends. Truth be told, it took a lot of courage to decide what they have decided. It is sad, but I am even sadder to hear of people who pass comments on who was right and who was wrong and who was immature and who wasn't thinking clearly and who is the victim and who is to be pitied. When I broke up with my ex boyfriend, those comments only made things worse, because it adds burden to the already difficult consequences.

The truth is, we will never really know what my 2 friends went through. At the end of the day, whatever decisions they make, they will be the ones who have to live the consequences. It is not for us to pass those comments because it is not us who will have to live the consequences.

God place us where we are to love the people He loves. Our job is to love and respect people, not to feel emotions for them. Certainly not to be the judge of who is right or wrong, nor judge what should be their right decisions. My job, where my 2 friends are concerned, is to be there for them as they brace the painful consequences themselves and to assure them that God will carry them through. I wish more people will understand that.

If you are reading this and you know who I am talking about, I'd like to ask you to stop talking about the decision (if you are) and stop indulging in such conversations with other people. Stop talking about who is right or wrong, or how it should be, because that's not our job. Instead, channel your energy to care for them and be there for them, because they need friends, not judges. Pray for them, that they'll be able to sort themselves out and especially, that in this process, they'll be able to draw themselves closer to God.

Simply because, God told us to love our neighbours. It's not rocket science, really.

Destination : Cordoba, Spain

Cordoba is highly influenced by the Arabs. A lot of stuff was explained in the tour of Cordoba but the most significant fact is how the Mezquita, which used to be a mosque, has now been converted into a cathedral.

I love the blue skies. This is the river Guadalquivir.

Outside the Mezquita

Inside the Mezquita, the Arabic architectural influences still remain.

Apart from the Mezquita, this wasn't one of my favourite places to visit. Good to know about, though.